- "Recognizing Your Nemesis:
- At some point in the past, this person was (arguably) your best friend.
- You and this person once competed for the same woman, and you both failed.
- You have punched this person in the face.
- If invited, you would go to this person's wedding and give them a spice rack, but you would secretly hope that their marriage ends in a bitter, public divorce.
- People who barely know the two of you assume you are close friends; people who know both of you intimately suspect you profoundly hate each other."
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